A Less Dream Is A Big Dream
A man should dream, said the world.
Then, can I dream a simple life?
No. That's a terrible way of life.
Thus, A Toddler Story
When I have the ability to achieve a dream, I often go the other route. I thought at first because I love challenge and getting challenged. I thought it was because I love to hurt myself. Or, something about the others toy are more interesting.
Why is it like this?
A Toddler Riddle
When is it the time when I was change into a toddler who would love to grab other toddler's play? Especially, when the other toddler enjoying his play. I would want that toy more badly than ever. Even if the adult have decided to give two identical toys to each of us, I want his!
Chasing other toddler's toy is somewhat becoming bogus and dull. I keep the hardship to give pain and sadness to have that toy. I show him who's the boss! We struggle until I came out as a victor.
Sadly, when I get my hands on it, I lost interest in that toy. I tried to have the play copied from him. I tried to fantasize the same theme. Why aren't this vision with me? Why don't they get smiled back at me?
Why would the toy lost its worth?
When I see him playing that toy, he seemed smiles. He was having fun. He was ... there playing and laughing.
I tried to turn his toy back. But, his eye already lost its color. He don't want it anymore.
Ugh, why? Why won't you play again? Show me! Show me how the best way to play it. One moment ago you seemed have fun about it.
I, the worst toddler in the world. Wished to repent. Wished for my past to change. But, that toddler already disappointed. That toddler already weeping....
I understand now. What I want is that boy's smile on my face, the excitement he got from the toy, the laugh of life.
The toy, it wasn't there to give the fun. It was made to stimulate my mind. To be able to smile about it. To fantasize about crazy fun stuff. I am Upin and Ipin of my world.
But, now, it's only a regret...
The Green Grass, The Kite and The Sun
Once upon a time, I have a kite. I was on a prairie with wind and
I run with the kite and gave the string away as it flew into the sky. I could felt the smile on my face. A chuckle then followed with laughter. What was that ticklish feeling on my head? Felt like I was the best.
Look, I could watched the vast blue sky and the clouds. The fluffy white cloud. My kite was there soaring. I was the captain of the sky.
Woaaahh... what a beautiful scene. I was seeing something that I have never seen before. I watched beautiful formation of birds flew to the sun. I watched the rocket flew into the moon. And I bathed at the beautiful sunset.
Wow, I never knew the world was this beautiful. I wanted to play with my kite again tomorrow and the days after. Yeah, that sounded great!
"Whoa, baby, where have you gone. We've been looking for you...."
Eh, what? A sound of an adult.
"You should stop playing in here. These are dirt. Look at you." The adult raised an eyebrow.
She gently embraced me. I watched her face. She looked panic. Her eyes were ready to shower with tears. She needed to be cheered.
Ah, I know, let me show her the fun. Here, take my kite.
"Stop it! Let go of the string. You mustn't play with this." Said the adult. She forcefully ungrab my hand from the string and the kite.
I want to weep, but I must be strong. That adult was there to find me. I needed to poo-poo. My stomach was longing to eat. I didn't want to get punished.
"Hello beautiful babies, rise and shine!"
The gentle voice woke me up. I was in a playing ground with many toddlers. We had so many toys around us. The wall was full of cute things. The adults watched over us.
We can be ourselves. We can get the things we like. We don't have to feel hurt. There are plenty of toys here. A bubble gun with non-irritating bubble. It was made with safety for us, toddler. I first played with it.
The room was vast, the toy were much. I was having fun with it.
I gazed and found out that the ceiling were full of beautiful things as always.
But, why aren't you shine, Sun? Clouds, why aren't you moving? Why the bird is still there?
Then, the day after tomorrow, I still asked and they weren't moving. The day after... and after... and after.... they only stood there. I realized the bird's wings wasn't moving.
What was wrong with them? Why were they becoming silence? Why won't they answer my question?
What is this place?
"Baby, why won't you play?" Another adult came to me. She seemed worried about me.
"Here, choose what you like. There, this toy can...." I could no longer heard what she said. As I closed my eyes, my thought was slipping out from my body.
I was in the field of the other days before. I could hear the bird sang. I was on my kite, flew through the fluffy clouds. The birds were tailing me. They follow me as we flew through the sky.
I could watched the meadow. It was painted with beautiful green. So this is how it supposed to? Wow, I can feel the warmth of the sun. All day we play.
The birds flew away to the sunset. As they elegantly flew, they waived their wings; saying goodbye to me.
I smiled, and waved my hand too.
"Goodbye birds, see you tomorrow."
The birds quacking as if they wanted to tell me their affirmation.
A drop of tear falling from one of my eye....
As I woke up from that, my eyes stopped glowing. I found myself in a place where I should play. A place where I should have fun. A place where I must select toys that 'fun'.
A place where dirty kite have no place.